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How My Abortion Has Almost Ruined My Life…

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I got an e-mail from a lady who had read one of my articles about Teen Parenting. After reading it, I thought everyone should know her story on abortion. There are so many women out there that are using abortion for their birth control. There are so many women who are going into abortion clinics and are blind as to what is going to happen. If you have read anything of mine, you would already know that I am Pro-Life. I would rather see parents make an adoption plan or parent the baby rather than have an abortion. People think that abortion is the ‘quick fix,’ but it’s not. Here is our guests story.

I was a senior in high school and I had the college I wanted to attend already picked out with a scholarship to go along with it. One night at a party I had a little too much to drink and one thing lead to another. I had a one night fling with someone who I thought was my friend, but turned out he was a whole different person when he realized that I was pregnant. He also had a full scholarship to go play baseball. He told me “he wasn’t ready to be a dad and that I should just take care of it.” I didn’t tell a soul, even though rumors began to fly.

One morning, I got up, told my parents that I wanted to drive out to the campus that I was planning to attend in the fall, but instead, I had found an abortion clinic that I was going to go to. I had already talked to them on the phone and made an appointment. I didn’t know what to expect. I walked in and it was like a normal doctor’s office. There were some pregnant ladies in there that were even obviously showing in their pregnancy. The informed me I wouldn’t see anything. I was only 5 weeks along, so it would be a quick process. I remember just closing my eyes and hearing the most awful sounds.

I got home and couldn’t sleep for days. I was depressed. A couple days later, my mom pulled me aside and asked about my abortion. She had seen the paperwork that was sent home with me under the seat of my car. She told me I was to tell nobody. She was in shock. We were Christians and always had been involved in the church. She couldn’t believe what I had done.

I went on to college, and my life somewhat normal. I had weird dreams about the abortion..even years later down the line. I met the guy of my dreams at college. We graduated and got married shortly after. He was so excited to start having children, but I had a heavy heart and couldn’t stop thinking about the baby I had aborted 5 years earlier. I got pregnant really quick. He (my husband) couldn’t wait to text a picture to everyone of the positive pregnancy test. Everyone was excited. Just 3 weeks later, I miscarried the baby that I was pregnant with. It was like a slap in the face. I had lost a baby all over again. My husband was stayed pretty positive. After 4 miscarriages, I told him I wanted to stop trying for a little while. This began to cause problems in our marriage..big ones.

By this point, I am taking a medication for anxiety attacks and a sleep aid. I visited my ob/gyn. She informed me that scarring from the abortion was keeping me from being able to carry a child. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. All my husband wanted was a family…and I wasn’t able to give him children. I didn’t know what to say.

Now, it’s been almost 11 years since my abortion. I have still yet to get pregnant. I am divorced. I did come out and tell my ex-husband about my abortion. I have told my closest friend from high school. I don’t want this to seem like a bad, awful story with a cruddy ending. But I have had to endure a lot of heartache.

I saw my ex-husband quickly remarry and have a child within the first year of marriage. My Dad wants to comfort me, but he doesn’t know the whole story about my abortion. My mother and I haven’t had a good relationship since the blow-up we had when she found my abortion papers. Yes, she accepts me, but is my closer to my older sister and brother who live great lives. My life is full of blessings, but I wish I wouldn’t have ever had an abortion. It’s caused physical, emotional and mental issues with me. I volunteer my time sitting outside the same abortion clinic trying to talk girls out of it. I don’t want to shove it down anyone’s throat..but I want people to be aware. Don’t make the same heartless, selfish decision that I did.

I am grateful for our guest for sharing her story with us. Wow. You truly never know what it’s like to go through an abortion. Society covers it up good and makes it like it’s a quick problem solver, but never goes into details about the possible risks that come with it. If you are someone who is pregnant and thinking of abortion, please consider making an adoption plan and giving your baby a life. Feel free to e-mail me and talk–completely confidential.

If you are suffering after having an abortion, you are not in this alone. Please reach out to someone and talk things over.

Please like, share, and tell us your thoughts. Are you a teen parent with a story? We want to hear from you!

Lord, I pray for all these teenagers that are facing the hard decision of abortion, making an adoption plan or to parent the baby. Give us courage, Lord, courage to make the right decision, courage to stand up for what is right, and courage if we have made a decision we regret. Give us strength each day and guide us as we are going through this. In Jesus Name!

Until next time….be encouraged!

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Sexting- Talk About IT With Your Kids!

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blogcell

I don’t fully understand why parents get so weird about talking to their child about sex. It is something of this world and they should know about it! I was a teenage parent, and I let my children and stepchildren know how hard it was and how I got there! I tell them that I hope that they don’t take the same path that I did. But, since I was a teenager, there is a popular thing that has surfaced between tweens (yes 11 and 12 year olds too) and teenagers…..SEXTING!
Most parents can put two and two together and figure out what sexting is. Most of it starts out as harmless texting, then comes pictures and then comes sexting! A lot of kids these days are pressured into this. Nothing has changed since you and I were teenagers. They still pull the, “If you love me you will send me a picture..” “You don’t even have to have your face in the picture…” “I will delete it once you send it..” “Nobody will see it but me..” Can you see where I’m going?
So, why is it important to talk to your tweens/teens about sexting and why it is inappropriate, disrespectful, and not classy? Teenagers should know limits. I can’t say this enough. Have limits for your children, especially on the phones! If your child has a phone and has any interest in the opposite sex, it’s time to have the up-to-date birds and bees talk.
How to be an active parent:
Talk to your son/daughter- I can not say it enough about how important it is to have a close relationship with your children! Talk to them about respecting the opposite sex! If you have a daughter, teach her to value her body and demand respect when it comes to her body. Teach her the meaning of having value and respect for her body. If you have a son, teach him how to respect himself. Often boys grow up thinking their privates are the greatest thing ever! Make sure your son doesn’t grow up with this mentality! If you don’t have serious conversations about this particular topic, your son might have this mentality!! It’s good to talk to your children about the dangers or sexting and how it can ruin their reputation!
Dads need to be involved- Having a male figure in your child’s life that is actively involved is crucial! Especially during the times that they are teenagers! Girls need a male role model to be in their lives to show them how men should treat women. Boy should have a male role model so they will know how to treat women. Girl’s should never be downgraded by being asked for a nude or very private picture. Men can be good at teaching both guys and girls this!
Monitor your children- I know some people might disagree with me, but children need limits! Check up on your child! If you ever suspect your child is going through anything different in their lives, or if your child has a boyfriend/girlfriend, it is always good to monitor their social media accounts and text messages!
Lord, we ask you to teach us how to parent during this rough time in our child’s life. It seems like daily they are faced with “the new thing.” Help us and guide us on how to be the best parents that we can be. Lord, we ask you to guide our children and the decisions that they make. Help them and give them strength and wisdom during their times where they feel peer pressure.
Until next time…be encouraged!!!