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Is God Allowed in Your Marriage?

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Is God Allowed in Your Marriage?

Isn’t it a little bit odd how we seem like we allow everyone else to be a part of our marriage, everyone but God? Now, I am not saying that you aren’t a Christian, because I have been a Christian since before I married my husband, and there have been times where I haven’t allowed God to be a part of my marriage.

What I mean when I say that God isn’t a part of your marriage, is that we have trouble in our marriage, we need advice, we have things that happen in our lives and we talk about it to our friends, family members, people that we work with, or even perfect strangers. Of course, we might say the quick little prayer that we all tend to say, “God, help me get through this.” But, we never invite Him to be a part of our marriage.

I have shared with this blog how my husband and my first year of marriage was rough. We were in church and I remember getting into arguments with my husband and saying these quick “God, why aren’t you helping my marriage?” “God fix my marriage!” But, I would spend hours on the phone telling my best friend and really expecting her to have the answer. Are you catching my drift here?

God created women for men. It says that they are leave their parents and become one. I think that God believe that God knows that we would have difficult eve that God knows that we would have difficult times in our marriages. I believe that God knows that we will be tempted in our marriages. I believe He knew everything when He created marriage and I also believe that He wants to be a part of our marriages.

Maybe you are a person who truly believes that God is a part of your marriage. That’s wonderful. God needs to be a part of our marriages. God needs to be present in our lives. As we allow God to be in the center of our marriages and lives, it doesn’t mean that our lives or marriages will be perfect, but it does mean that they are possible. Things that come up in our marriage are possible to get through with God.

Trust God with your marriage. Have you ever heard the quote, “Have you prayed about it as much as you’ve talked about it?” That’s what I am talking about. We are quick to let the people in our lives direct our thoughts and sway our decisions about our relationships. And, our family and friends may mean well, but sometimes they begin to talk negative towards our marriage. So, when did we stop allowing God be a part of our marriage? When did we stop reading in to what God has to say about our marriage? He has plenty to say about marriage. He has plenty to say about the temptations we may endure during our marriage.

So, I’ll ask again. Is God allowed in your marriage?

Lord, I pray that we are allowing You to be a part of our marriages. We may be Christians, and might not understand what it means to have you be a part of our marriage. I pray that the ones who don’t understand will begin to understand. Show them in a way that only they could understand. I pray that before we are too quick to run to our friends, families, and even strangers about our problems and difficulties that we are having in our marriage, that we will begin to really search for you and what your answers are for our marriages!

Until next time…be encouraged!!!

50 Shades of My Marriage Sucks!

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It may be a little bit late to hop on this band wagon, but I do have a lot to say about this whole trend of 50 Shades of Grey. When I first heard about the books that were coming out, I was somewhat intrigued. My husband and I were separated, I thought I needed some romance in my life, but what did I know? I have never been a reader, and really didn’t care to spend money on a book that I was going to probably not finish anyways.

The trend of the books died down and then comes the movie. Every married, single, (it didn’t matter) lady was going to see this movie. Some were going to see the movie with their friends some were going to see the movie with their spouse. It was crazy to think some of these people were in the theaters watching this movie and then sitting in church the next morning.

I got to thinking how many men (with already pornography issues-maybe their wife/girlfriend is aware, maybe not) but how many men were triggered by this spicy, sexy movie? How many women have gotten themselves into pornography because they want more spicy in their marriage!

I have admitted, I have never read the books nor have I watched the movies. But, I do know what it is like to have a drought in the marriage. You get married, kids come along, you’re tired, you don’t really want to be intimate…but then again you know you should be and you want to be. It’s confusing being an adult, huh? But, back to the subject. I know marriages can go through periods and seasons where it is crappy. Sex is not the way it should be, communication is not good..so you argue, and marriages are torn apart!

People begin to turn to outlets when their marriages go down hill. They turn to pornography, technology, the flirty co-worker at the office. Things are thrown at marriages straight from the pit of Hell, and if our marriages is not going great 97% of the time, we will find an outlet to make us happy. And, let’s just be honest, a movie that is known to be about sex and spiciness, and a person who is wanting to see this type of movie or read this type of book is looking for something in their life!

Don’t get me wrong, I love sexy, but sexy should be kept in YOUR bedroom with YOUR spouse. A movie, a porno, a magazine, a book, an affair will only last for a season….then you will be looking for the next thing to get you excited in marriage. God created marriage and it is written in black and white in the Good Book..there are no shades of grey when it comes to God’s word and how he intended marriage to be.

I am not trying to judge anyone, but simply say, “Hey, I’ve been there!!” “I’ve looked for outlets in my marriage and THANK GOD it didn’t lead to enough destruction that is destroyed my marriage!” God loves you, and He loves your marriage. I truly believe if we ask Him how to spice up our marriage, He will give us the desire and wisdom and it will be something of Him.

If you have an issue with your marriage, and have been looking for an outlet or have found an “outlet” I just want to pray for you–

Lord God, I know that marriage is hard and that we go through so many droughts in our marriage–droughts in our bedroom. Lord, the World tries to throw these outlets at us, but God I pray that we recognize them and choose to turn to you on how to fix our marriage. Let our outlet be You, Lord! Lord, I pray that any man or woman that deals with addiction to pornography or anyone who uses pornography to satisfy their needs be healed. I pray that us that are in relationships and married, that we turn to you!

Until next time….be encouraged!

Why Do We Pray?

girl-15599__180 I have always considered myself to be a prayerful person. Even if it was the prayer of, “Oh Lord, don’t let that cop give me a speeding ticket..just let it be a warning!!” (Don’t even try to judge, you know you’ve done it too!) But, really, growing up, I guess I was never really taught to pray other than the, “God is great, God is good, let us thank Him for this food.” My cousins and I had it memorized. We all said it together. It wasn’t until started having a relationship and somebody telling me that God wants to hear from us, when I really considered praying meaningful prayers. But, why should we pray? Why do we pray if God is supposed to already know what is going  to come out of our mouths? This was something that never crossed my mind because I’ve never really been the person to pick apart things. Now, my husband on the other hand, he picks apart. He wants to know the history of things, and why we should be doing what we are doing and when we are doing it. I guess that’s just he knowledge-driven person he is.

But, back to the question. Why you do we pray? Have you ever been in love? Remember when you first fell in love with THAT person and you just couldn’t get enough of them. You wanted to talk on the phone for hours, you wanted to see their face. That is exactly how God feels about us. Yes, He knows our needs, what we will say, but God loves to hear you voice. Your voice is precious to Him. And when you talk to Him, He loves watching your face. A sweet guy who really ministers to me put this prayer vision in my mind. God wants to hear from you. As a matter of fact, He can’t wait to hear your voice. As a day, or a week or even a month goes by, like anyone we love and would be sad if we didn’t talk to for that long–I believe God feels that way towards us. He never goes anywhere. He misses us when we don’t talk to Him. And, as we talk to Him, we are building an intimate relationship with Him.

I’ve had seasons in my life where I don’t feel close to God. But, it wasn’t God that had moved, it was me. God loves us so much. If we could just grasp that concept. God cares for us. He hurts when we hurt. Believe that. So, just like any friend or lover or family member, schedule a date to talk with God.

Lord, I pray that we draw closer to You, because it says in Your Word that if we draw close to you, you will draw close to us. Lord, let us see and feel your love. Put it on our hearts to pray for family, friends and even strangers because you want to hear our prayers. Lord, let us have a deeper relationship with you like never before. As we pray to you, I pray that we just grow deeper in love with You.

Share this, pin it, like it, follow it, e-mail it!!! Let’s get the word out and get some people encouraged!!!

Until next time..be encouraged!!!!

How to Fix the Brokeness Around Us.

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In a “perfect” world, everyone will get along with each other, marriages would last forever, children would be respectful and full of joy, people would always be financially stable, and there would be absolutely no worry in the world. Unfortunately, we actually live in the complete opposite. The world we live in is full of hatred, marriages are treated like pieces of clothing (if it doesn’t work for you, you take it back and exchange it for something new), children are plotting to kill their parents and to kill themselves, people are losing their jobs and becoming homeless, and there is worry and fear all around us.

Think about how many people we come in contact with per day. Think of how many people we pass in Target, our waitresses at the restaurant, our friends on social media. We pass brokenness everyday…but what do we do about it? I have been guilty of seeing things, especially on social media, that I haven’t done anything about. I kept…and still from time to time keep the mentality that “I can’t help anyone” or “God can’t use me” but God has created and qualified us to do something about the brokenness around us.

A couple of years ago while I was in the store, I was standing behind a lady who smelled of alcohol. Smelling of alcohol at 8 in the morning can never be good. She had a tear stained face. I wish I would have had the nerve to just ask her if I could pray for her. What was the worst she could have said? I let my fear get the best of me, and never asked her or struck up a conversation with her. Soon after, I saw on Pinterest about how people would do things to make someone’s day. I began to pray for God to show me how I could brighten or encourage someone’s day. One day, I was in the Dollar Store, and I saw these bright, funky, little cards that was blank inside. I bought several packages of these blank cards. I kept a stack of cards in my house and a stack of cards in my purse. When I felt encouraging words come on, I would write a letter to someone. I would tell them how special they were. I would tell them that it doesn’t matter what their past looked like, that God could turn their future around. I would basically write things and imagine that I was talking to a stranger that just needed some encouragement.  I would pass out these cards everywhere. I would leave them in the bathroom stalls, hand them to the person in the pay line at McDonald’s, leave them at gas pumps and at the car wash. I would pray that the right person would find them. This was my way of encouraging a stranger.

I have different people say that they try to bless the car behind them by paying for their lunch. I have people that say they have made it a point to smile at people they pass, or give them a compliment. There are many different ways we can make this broken world that we live in less broken. Will you help me in the Encourage Movement? I challenge you to try to bless someone this week. If you don’t know how, pray that God will give you your own idea. If you need encouragement yourself, I have a prayer request section at the top of the page or you can always e-mail me!

Pray for me and this blog! I want people to see it and to be encouraged! I want to make a difference in someone’s life. Share, pin, or e-mail this post!

Until next time….be encouraged!

Growing Up Overnight…Teen Parenting

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This blog is full of encouragement for everyone…including teenage parents. I am here to tell a little bit of my story and hopefully shine some encouragement on those that are finding out they are going to be parents.

I remember the fear that I felt when I finally grasped the concept that I was going to be a Mother…to a child…when I was still a child myself. I was so scared and had no clue what my life would hold. I thought my life was over. In a perfect world, I thought, “I am about to have a baby with ‘the man of my dreams’ and we will get married, get a small house, and we will live happily ever after.” Gosh, was I wrong.

My parents and family along with his parents and family found out that I was pregnant. They were all crushed and disappointed, as any parent would be. I couldn’t even face my Dad because I had let him down so much and I knew it. I had to go to school but hated it because there I was wobbling down the halls getting so many awful looks from other students and even teachers. I spent most of the time in the bathroom stalls crying and just wishing my life was over. I had no clue what to do or how to act. I believe it was during this time where I really found out what depression was.

There was a lot of trouble after the baby was born. The father of the baby and I didn’t last long after the baby was born. Even after we had a baby and had been through everything..pregnancy, fighting, our parents clashing because they had different points of view on how to raise the baby….my child’s father still had just one thing on his mind. I could punch him in his throat….not really, but in my head, thinking about that right now. As I mentioned, we didn’t last long. It wasn’t long until he had moved on with his life and here I was trying to raise a kid, sleepless nights, arguing with my parents, going to school, trying to live a normal life.

I decided I needed to get in church. Hey, it’s the least I could do, right? So there I was, getting dropped off at church with my baby. I had always believed in God, but didn’t know what it was like…or even get a glimpse of how to have a relationship with Him. I thought, “I am going to Hell because I have had a kid..” “I can’t make my life right..” “I’m such a screw-up.” Those church folks didn’t really know what it was like to have a relationship with Jesus either, because they thought the same things that I did…that I was going to Hell, I couldn’t make my life turnaround, and I was a screw-up. I still went to church and have no clue why, I guess I was trying to raise my child in church. I wanted and still want more for my kids than I have.

Looking back, I realize that that enemy that I always talk about started telling me lies right off the bat. That I was worthless, not worthy of God’s love, that I was a screw-up. I stayed mad and upset at myself for a long time I don’t even want to think about what kind of person I was. I am sure I was much less than pleasant to deal with. I am sure a lot of teenage parents think the same thing. They have messed up their lives and clueless of what to do. I learned to just let the haters motivate me. I graduated school…and college..and got married. The father of my oldest child hasn’t been a part of their lives, but in my eyes, we’ve done just fine without him.

If you are a teenage mom, don’t lose hope. Just do the best you can and if you are doing the best you can, don’t listen to what other people have to say about you. Until they have walked in your shoes, they have no room to talk. Don’t get too down if it doesn’t work out with the father of your baby. I stayed upset at that for a long time, and still from time to time wonder why the father of my child has chosen to not be a part of my child’s life. He’s missed so much because he chose to do him first.

If you are a teenage father, do what you are supposed to do for the baby. No, you might not make it with the mother of your child, but that doesn’t give you the excuse to cut tithes with your baby. Have a relationship with your children because it really does something to their lives when you aren’t present in their lives. Support your child, because it is hard to raise a child on your own.

Being a teenage parent doesn’t mean your life is over, it just mean you will have a different ending that you expected. I’m praying for you!

Know someone who is pregnant? E-mail them this post!

Until next time….be encouraged!!!

God, where are you?

Have you ever just sat there and wondered, “God, where are you?” I can recall one time, I was driving around in my car, my kids were fighting in the backseat and not listening to me, my husband and I had been fighting for several days over stupid, little nothings and I was thinking “God, where are you?” With tears streaming down my face, I felt so weak. I had prayed for God to give me strength, but still, I felt so hopeless. . Why wasn’t my marriage working? Why weren’t my kids listening? Why was I always depressed? What was wrong with me? What was I doing that was so wrong? I was always at church when the doors were open, I posted and listened to nothing but Christian music. WHY???!!!

I believe we all get to thinking at one time, “God, where are you?” A lot of things might trigger this thought that we have probably more than once in our lives. Maybe you are going through a season in your life where you are wondering where He is.

Have you ever read the book of Job in he Bible? Oh my gosh! If you could think of the worse things happening, it probably happened to Job. Job lost his children (Job 1:19), he had horrible sores on his feet to the top of his head (Job 2:7) and by this time, Job’s wife started getting down on him and telling him to just curse God! (Job 2:9) This isn’t even the beginning of what Job experienced in his life. Job experiences a lot of misery in his life, but he kept being patient..although, Job did wonder why he was going through what he did.

The answer, God is with us. He promises to never leave or forsake us. I knew that scripture, and still felt lonely. If we question God and wonder why we are going through the things that we do, I believe that it’s okay.  God is big enough for our questions. I believe we will find his answers if we will just be still and listen.

Whatever you are going through or have been going through, know that God hasn’t gone anywhere…He is with you. He will answer you, just look for His answers. I have found that God gives me my answers sometimes while I am reading the Bible encouragement from a friend, a song on the radio, or just by the Holy Spirit speaking to my heart. God cares for you, He sees your struggles and whether we feel it at the time or not, He’s giving us strength.

We will have times where we are in the valley and can’t see the light at the tunnel, but know that it’s coming and you are not alone. We will have times where we are on the mountain and everything is right in place in life…if that is you, reach out to someone who is hurting. I believe God uses our struggles in life to make us stronger people and make it to where we can minister to other broken people. The encouragement just keeps moving from person to person.

I hope that this post find you well, and if it doesn’t , I pray that you get strength and peace for your situation. DO NOT GIVE UP!! Your tests become your testimonies and your messes become your messages!!

Until next time…be encouraged!!!