I’ve had a lot of people ask me about divorce. What I thought of divorce, how to cope with divorce, what to do if your spouse doesn’t want you anymore…ect. Even though I have never experienced divorce first hand, I have had witnessed many of my friends and family go through divorce or divorces. I was a child that witnesses her parents getting divorced.
I was talking to one of my friend’s, who recently got served with divorce papers. I often ask them how things are going and how the kids are coping with it. My heart really goes out to marriages who are cracked or completely broken and aren’t getting repaired. Divorce is truly the most devastating heartbreak next to death. Divorce is often compared to death because something inside you dies along with you when you read that your divorce is final.
So, what do you do when your marriage ‘just doesn’t work?’ I hate reading people’s posts on Facebook about them getting divorced and people tell them, “Well, there are more fish in the sea!” Yeah, there are more people out there, but that’s probably the last thing on someone’s mind when they are enduring such a heartache, So, my advice to you if your marriage just didn’t work.
Make the best of it- If there are kids involved, then try to stay strong for yourself so that you can be strong for them. IF you are the custodial parent, don’t play games with kid’s. Just because you are hurt doesn’t mean that you can use the kids as bait. Be fair. When you make decisions, keep your and your children’s best interest at heart.
Pray!- If you believe in God, take this hardest time in your life to get close to God. Pray that he will give you strength. There are many scriptures that talk about God’s strength, and His power. I know that at the beginning of your divorce, you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it’s there! Hang on my friend.
Don’t be too quick to look for the ‘other fish’- Yeah, you will always have that one friend who wants to go out and get crap faced to celebrate divorce. That’s twisted! Divorce is nothing to celebrate unless you have been in an abusive relationship and have gotten out alive! Don’t try to go out and get a rebound, have one night stands, ect.. That’s never any good and most importantly…keep in mind “Will I regret this later?” “Will this set a good example for my kids?”
If your are too low, get help!- I have talked about suicide on this blog, and I am not necessarily talking about people committing suicide..but a divorce is heartbreaking. Yes, there is a time for YOU to grieve by yourself, but if the pain gets even ALMOST unbearable, seek help! Get with some positive friends, someone that will hold you accountable. If there are no positive people that you can turn to, go find a church and there are plenty of pastor’s that will counsel with you!
If you are going through a divorce and need prayer, please don’t hesitate to message me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Lord, I pray for all those marriages that just haven’t worked out for whatever reason. It says in Your word, Lord, that whoever is brokenhearted, that you draw close to them! Lord, draw close and let these brokenhearted people feel your love. Give them strength on how to deal with this heartbreaking time. Give us wisdom.
Until next time….be encouraged!!!